I like to consider myself and avid recreational sociologist. In lay men's terms, I like to people watch and breakdown what I see. Many times I can find extensive pleasure while sitting in an airport terminal. As each individual walks by I, my instincts take over, and my mind begins to conjure this person's story. I don't focus as much on where they are coming from or headed to, but rather their characteristics. Are they cocky, demure, outgoing, a pacifist or my future wife or sister-in-law.
It is a fun little game, and it can become even more interesting when the person stays in your eyeline for extended periods of time. Having more minutes to watch them in their ways gives you the chance to test your theories and speculations.
Well, that is the sort of sociological evaluating I do in recreational settings. Being a person with quite prominent ADHD, my mind is constantly seeking new stimulation and occupation. That being said, I can't help but ponder the causal mechanisms behind each word, tick and movement my senses are able to catch. I find my senses especially heightened while at work, and especially so when in negotiations with representatives of other companies.
It is the job of both parties involved in the negotiation to reach and end result that is beneficial in both the long and short run (ideally). I have become more and more aware, through my repetitive observation and analysis, that ego can frequently block ideal success. The potential to acquire power and leverage in a given situation, as miniscule as it may be, can leave many mouths watering.
To deny that I have fallen victim to such trivial acquisitions of power on a number of occasions would be an outright lie. But, I do have the ability to say that such desires have not brought me to dishonesty for personal pleasure. Many times the lies that have been thrown my way were given for no other reason that to make me look foolish. There was no profit to be made, now leverage to be gained, and certainly no benefit to the relationship to be had. It was nothing more than sheer passive aggressive behavior. Use of control for control's sake.
What sparks repetitive passive-aggressiveness?? Were these all the fat kids in school?? Were these all social outcasts?? Are they still social outcasts?? Is it their position at work, their position in the marriage??
There are endless possibilities of what is responsible. Regardless, I think binding factor for any of the things that is actually responsible is self-esteem. These people lack enough perceived personal value to feel adequate with themselves. They need small victories in insignificant situations, even if they come at the expense of the respect of others. I certainly know that I lose more and more respect with each instance where passive aggressive behavior is utilized. Honesty is one of my most cherished traits, in myself and in others. And whether you a person explicitly lies in their passive aggressive act, the acts themselves are based upon false pretenses, and therefore inherently dishonest.
Be forthright. Who really wants a passive aggressive jackass as a friend??
